Tips on taming your child’s temper, from the STHS Parenting Center

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By Alexis Dill M.S. PLMFT, adill@stph.org

Just like adults, children are capable of having a hard day, but there are temper tantrum techniques to help parents through the toddler and preschool years.

Temper tantrums typically occur because of one of five reasons:

1. They are disrupted during a fun or rewarding activity.
2. They are punished for wrong behavior.
3. They are denied rewarding objects or activities.
4. They are tired, hungry, sick or suffering biological upset.
5. They receive attention for their unruly behavior, whether that be negative or positive attention from their parent and/or guardian.

It is important that when a child is throwing a temper tantrum, the parent remembers to never take it personally. It’s not a reflection of who you are as a parent. What matters is how you maintain your composure during the episode and help your child through it.

One important technique in dealing with tantrums is to remember that your child is looking to you to be the calm in their storm. Take care of yourself first. If you need to step away, take some deep breaths, count to ten, do so. Your child will feed off of your anger and frustration, so be sure to do what you need to do in order to calm yourself down and tackle the behavior calmly and rationally. Your reaction will determine if this behavior persists.

If you find that you are having a particularly hard time with this, feel free to call The Parenting Center at 985-898-4435 to set up a Parent Coaching appointment. We would be glad to help you navigate through your child’s challenging behavior.

Alexis Dill is a provisionally licensed marriage and family therapist. She serves as education coordinator at St. Tammany Health System’s Parenting Center and can be reached at adill@stph.org.

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Below, find a list of upcoming Parenting Center classes for new parents and new siblings. For details and a full calendar of events, visit STPH.org/Parenting Center, email adill@stph.org or call 985-898-4435.

• The Parenting Center hosts a Baby and Me Support Group on Thursdays from 10:30 to 11:30 a.m. The class is free and open to the public. It will be facilitated by Education Coordinator Alexis Dill. This weekly group provides socialization for new babies as well as a time for new parents to collaborate and talk about new parent struggles.
• The Parenting Center will host a Boot Camp for New Dads on Saturday (July 18) from 9 a.m. to noon. The class is open to the public and costs $15. It will be facilitated by veteran fathers and will teach rookie dads the realities of fatherhood. Topics include caring for mom and baby.
• The Parenting Center will host Baby Chat for Siblings on Saturday (July 18) from 10 to 11:30 a.m. The class costs $10 per family and is open to the public. Facilitating will be Juli Chastaine CCLS MS, who will teach big brother and/or big sister everything they need to know about becoming a big sibling. Topics include proper handling of newborns and coping skills.